Self Reflection

Thinking deeply and self reflection today.

With the passing of my sister three years ago,  and the passing of my mother last Sunday,  I've come to realize that time is not on my side. I could very well, possibly develop, and I do have a 50% chance of developing Alzheimer's disease myself. So I think there needs to be some changes made. 

I have also come to realize that time is so short to be unhappy, time is too short to be angry, time is ticking away by the second.  Time is what's in the moment, and after the moment passes you can never get it back.

My grandmother and my mother used to say,

Live for today,

For tomorrow, we are not promised.

Live today like it's the last day you have in this lifetime.

Those words of wisdom, and reality, is what I have found myself today thinking about today.

As I reflect back over my past, and my memories, of my family in the past, and wanting to make changes to my family in the future.

It also makes me reflect over the last four years of living in Florida.  Is this where I really want to stay??  Or do I want to really get serious about selling my home, and all my belongings, and buying an RV, and hit the road with my husband, and my father,and take my father and my husband, to see things, and places they may have always wanted to visit, but never could.  

After my fathers retirement, my mother became sick with Alzheimer's. So the life that my father had planned on after his retirement became a dream, and he never got to make it a reality. And now that my mother has passed there's no reason why he should remain locked down at his home.  However, at his age he really doesn't need to be driving anymore, let alone a big RV. 

And this is the time that I may have reached the age where time is precious, every day is precious, every hour and every second is precious. I think I need to live by my mother's and my grandmothers, words of wisdom and start to live for today as it may be my last day...

Saying a bitter-sweet goodbye to momma

Okay so last Sunday July 30, 2017, my sweet momma spread her wings and flew to heaven to be with my sister Charlet, and other family that had preceded her. My young son Chris, and neice Traci Jo, along with my father, nursed my momma day in day out, with the help and guidance of hospice.  We tried very hard to make her transition from earth to heaven as painfree, and flawless as possible.

The help from family and friends, along with hospice, made this a very smooth journey for mom.  Although, it has really been hard on all of us, we know that momma is in God's arms and pain free and happy.

My life is forever changed, as I have never been part of palliative care, and it had me so confused and concerned.  Was I doing this correctly, and why did I have to do what I did.  But apparently I was doing the right thing.   During the last week of my mother's life, my oldest sister Debbie and I sang a song that my mother used to sing to us kids when she would wake us up in the morning to get ready for school. That song was:

Good morning to you,
Good morning to you,
We're  all in our places,
With  sunshiny faces,
Good morning to you,
Good morning to you.

 And at one point during the time we were singing this song to my mother, she sang back to us Good morning to you!  I was so happy that my heart was singing to hear my mother's voice. And at another time but I had told her I loved her so much she repeated back to me "I love you too".   A huge huge part of me told me but just for a second my mother was there with me and understood what I said because she repeated it back to me. I will never forget those two instances for the rest of my life.

 Today is the third day since we lost my mom, and it is raining outside and the thunder is rumbling in, and I sit here and think about my mom and how she used to love listening to the rain and the thunder outside. She used to say it was time to take a nap. That she could sleep really well when there was a nice quiet rainstorm outside.   Also today is I take the time to reflect back on memories with my mom I think about the happy times that we did have and some not so happy times,  but that's OK because life isn't perfect you always have to have some kind of bumps in the road to make you laugh to make you think because of the road was smooth as glass there would be no entertainment involved no laughter, no arguments, or disagreements,.

 Rest in peace my sweet momma,  One day we'll all meet in heaven together. I love you so much I miss hearing your voice and seeing your beautiful blue eyes because after all I have your blue eyes.

dream quilt create: Quilty Fun Sew Along, Week 10

dream quilt create: Quilty Fun Sew Along, Week 10

Newest Addition to my Sewing Machine Collection

Good Monday Morning!!
This post is a few days late because I need some "me time" with my newest addition to my sewing machine collection :-)
My I introduce "Helen".



Yes her cabinet is in need of repair but her decals show her true beauty.  The first owners painted the cabinet :-( so at this point all I can do it to sand it down and basically completely refinish the outside only.










I will explain the name in a minute.  I picked her up from a family in Ft Myers Florida last week for $100.00 and not a bad deal at all.  When I finally got the machine home I  got out the Murphy's oil soap and cleaned her up really good.  There was lots of grime and dirt.  Then the next task was to get her "unstuck".  See I took a chance on purchasing this machine because her hand wheel would turn so of course she was sewing at all and the owners were descendants of her previous 2 owners.  Helen came from a family in New York.  here is just a snip it of an email i received yesterday about my new "Helen" from the newest owners before me.  she writes "My husband's grandparents (Helen Eaton) were from New Rochelle, New York. " this also explains her new name I gave her in honor of the previous owner.  
Anyway after loosening every single nut and bolt and screw I was able to get her freed up and stitching again.  The culprit was a piece if thread about 1" long and the feed dogs had been crushed down on top of the bobbin casing and basically freezing it in place.  As soon as I could run get a couple of pieces if scrap fabric and a cone of thread we were making history treading again.  
I have always wanted a treadle machine to expire emcee just a smudge of what women back in history used to create quilts, clothing, mending, etc.  it is amazing the workout you get in your legs from treading.  I am getting a complete leg workout and being creative at the same time.
I can't wait to get my sewing room in order so I can get out ALL my machines and line them up so I can just go down that line and sew on each one for awhile.
My collection is a very small collection and I really do not feel as though I will be adding to it further.

My collection consists of:

(Stella) 
Serial # ES652042 belongs to Singer Model 221K
manufactured on May 15, 1961 in Clydebank, Scotland.
 (Mable) Singer Featherweight 221K
Serial #AL944515 belongs to Singer model 221
manufactured on January 17, 1955 in  Elizabeth, New Jersey.


(Marsha) Singer 66 Red Eye
Serial #G8878958 belongs to Singer Model 66
manufactured on June 29, 1921 in Elizabeth, New Jersey.


 (No name)
Singer Quantum 9920 (2005) 

(No name)
1 Singer Single (1999)

I have  my grandmothers Singer but I haven't dated it yet or found out any additional info on it yet.

Singer 301 Tan colored

Gammill longarm

Glaco 1 hp machine


Happy Quilting & Treadling
Brenda

Just a few of my favorite photos

This is me and my youngest son Christopher he lives in Dallas Texas.   I had gone down to visit him for Mother's Day weekend and he took me around all downtown Dallas.  We rode the Trolly car around a few times.  So much to see and do and now I can understand why he loves to live in Dallas.  I'm not much of a BIG CITY girl I like the laid back COUNTRY.  But that's okay too. This was taken just before my hubby and I  moved from Oklahoma to Florida.  I will always cherish this weekend.  Thank You Chris I love you.  Mom

Now this picture is of my 2 boys.  Chris (left) is the yongest and Tim(right of course) is the oldest by 5.5 years.  They are a handsome set of boys.  Don't you think so?  The oldest lives in Florida and has for many many years.  He has a little family and an addition to the family that came in Nov 2012. 



This is my newest machine.  Stella.  She is a 1941 model Singer Featherweight Sewing Machine.  I bought her for myself as I had been wanting a FW for several years and since my hubby has a hard time buying gifts for me I consider this one a wonderful gift from my hubby.  Thanks Baby

 

2012 Red & Gold First Christmas Tree in our New Florida Home

Well Christmas is over and I usually leave my tree up until at least New Years Day but I have decided to take it down early and pack it all up now that the official move from Oklahoma to Florida is over and I have tons of boxes to unpack so I might as well get this done too and that way as we arrange all our stuff I can organize everything to and have all my Christmas stuff in one place.  And while I'm at it I might as well go through the many, many, boxes of Christmas stuff and pick and chose what we will keep and what to donate.  I just have entirely too much stuff.  I usually decorate the Christmas Tree in a different theme every year and This year it was Red & Gold with a huge custom bow on the top made by my youngest son Christopher.  Thanks Baby
Both the boys Tim and Chris helped me decorate this tree this year.   

 VERY VERY Proud grandpa.  These are Jerry's grandboys back in Oklahoma Connor and Logan

 

 

Well that's just about it for today I have to get busy lot's to do and it looks  like it will all be indoors today as the clouds look heavy with rain.  Cold front coming in today Burrrrrr

It's 12:57 and I'm still up :C(

 Can't sleep a wink so I decided to do some searching around in Pinterest.  I just love that site, there are so many interesting sights and views and so so many ideas on how to decorate this and that. We just moved into this house in October and I'm still head high in boxes so I wiill keep working on those.  But I'm also wanting to get around and decorate and fix up the house.  DH doesn't have too much to say when it comes to decorating just if he doesn't like something.  But he does give his opinion and I really like that.

I came across some beautiful wall treatments that I really liked and they look so easy to duplicate in my own home with my own talents.  So I might just have to get those started.  I definitely know I don't want my house to loo "too old" for my age I still want a more modern Shabby Shiek kind of look. 

Went by West Elm boy do they have some really nice ideas.  I found a dining table that was made out of what appeared to be old oak pallets (distressed wood)  it still had all the nail holes in it and it was really nice.  I think that I would like to make it a bit bigger though.  I really like the height of the table.  DH said he could make the table and I can make the pads for the benches.  Awesome!!

And I found this couch $4000.00!!!  OM goodness that's so expensive but it is a Chocolate Leather Couch.  I just love it too.

I also found this lovely little bed set of comfy goodies.  Makes you just want to jump into your jammies and slip under the covers and watch TV and stay in out of the cold Burrrr

 

Maybe I will have to be extra good this year and Santa will bring me these goodies I have here.  So hope so.

 

Bittersweet Day

A Bittersweet Goodbye today at 6:00 am as my hubby and I and our oldest son said our goodbyes to the youngest son pictured here.  He came to visit for a week for Christmas and now it was time to tell him goodbndedb ye.  I promised myself I wouldn't cry but as always I always do.  Since he is now a new Uncle he has made a very fast and definite decision.  He is going to move to either Atlanta GA or Miami FL and make the east coast his home so he can be by his growing family and we are all so excited about the decision but only now we have to wait until he finds employment here or close by so he can afford gto make the move.

We all really enjoyed each others company over the holidays.  Yesterday we all went out to eat at a place called Blue Waters Grill in Jacksonville FL and then we attended a movie together.  We went and seen The Guilt Trip with Seth Rogen and Barbara Streisand.  After the movie we all were talking about how we could see bits and pieces of our lives and how we have been treated or treated others and this was really an eye opening movie.  It definitely told me to behave myself and let my kids make or break themselves and find the ways to make it.  It also showed me how my kids thru everything that we have taught them have grown up to be respective men in this world.  And that always makes a momma proud.


Well today I plan to take down the Christmas Tree.  I know its a bit early but I have so much I have planned to do and to get done.  We are leaving for a week long cruise in about 3 weeks so I have made myself a promise to at least empty/go thru 100 boxes a week until I have this house all sorted and cleaned up and everything I want put up or stored and the rest of it given away to Goodwill or something. :C)  So I had better get busy.  My hubby has to study, study, study to take his FL Realtors Test so he won't be much help until after his test on January 3, 2012, oops 2013.  I guess I better start practicing that as well writing 2013 lol I'm always horrible at just remembering dates.

Oh Boy what a mess!!   Do we REALLY need all this stuff.  What about that printer.  I have bought 2 more since I bought that one.  Nope!  Off to goodwill it goes.  And that Knee Board?  The kids haven't used that in so long and why in the world do I have it and in the houtse too??  Hmm  I have alot to go thru and get rid of.  Oh well better get started as soon as the coffee pot finishes brewing my cup of Joe I'm on it.

Have a nice day.  Stop by often.
Brenda